The House that Jo Built: Bonus Chapter Three: You’ve Got Chat!

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Smilax: I’ve got a confession to make

FunkyBunch: ok

Smilax: I know you

FunkyBunch: we’ve been chatting for a few weeks now, i hope you know me

Smilax: No, I mean i KNOW you. IRL.

FunkyBunch: how do you know I’m who you think i am?

Smilax: Because I knew who you were before saying hi to you in the NIN chatroom

FunkyBunch: you recognized me from my pic?

Smilax: LOL no that pic is fake

FunkyBunch: no it’s not, i told you my ex used to like to take photos. she used me as a model

Smilax: Ok. Then how do I know you go to Airy Heights?

FunkyBunch: what?

Smilax: You’re in the tenth grade and you go to Airy Heights. Believe me now?

FunkyBunch: tell me how you know this. now

Smilax: Please don’t be mad!!

FunkyBunch: i’m serious. how do you know where i go to school?

Smilax: Because i go there too

FunkyBunch: so… wait.. do i know you? in real life? How do you know who i am?

Smilax: Your nick is pretty obvious. That gave me a hunch. After that I did a whois on you and saw you’re connecting through the same ISP as me.

FunkyBunch: how is my nick obvious?

Smilax: Marky Mark?

FunkyBunch: holy shit. so you’ve known who i was this whole time??

Smilax: Please don’t be mad

FunkyBunch: why’d you let me lie to you? send that pic? you don’t know my parents do you?

Smilax: I don’t know, I just thought it was so cool to see you on here chatting like me. I thought I’d see where it went

FunkyBunch: so who are you then? this isn’t stephen is it?

Smilax: Eww no!

FunkyBunch: you obviously don’t go to rutgers so your pic is fake too. are you even a girl?

Smilax: YES!!!

FunkyBunch: who are you then?

Smilax: Now I’m afraid to tell you. You probably don’t even know who I am

FunkyBunch: that’s not fair. you can’t blow up my world like that then not tell me who you really are! unless you want to stop chatting? is that why you’re telling me this? you’re bored of talking to me?

Smilax: No! It’s the opposite! God, this isn’t going how I thought…

FunkyBunch: then tell me

Smilax: I’m… Julie. Juile Baldwin. From Mr. Alevato’s chemistry class.

FunkyBunch: i know who you are. just give me a minute to process

Smilax: Are you mad? Please don’t be mad

FunkyBunch: i’m trying to think back to all the stupid shit i told you

Smilax: You didn’t say anything bad… except that ex-gf photographer. No chick would ever believe that. You should just use your own pic, you can pass as college age

FunkyBunch: so… this is so crazy… why wouldn’t you just talk to me in class?

Smilax: …because on here we can be whoever we want and as honest as we want without anything bad happening. I guess I just wanted to chat with you as another human being instead of Mark the geek talking to Julie the slut

FunkyBunch: am i known around school as a geek?

Smilax: Mister 4.0 GPA? Yeah, you’re a super geek. And thanks for not disputing that i’m known as a slut 😛

FunkyBunch: that’s not what i meant! i mean…

Smilax: I know. It’s ok. I’m aware of what people say about me

FunkyBunch: guys talk all sorts of shit. my friends talk about stuff that didn’t happen all the time

Smilax: You mean Ant didn’t get blowjobs from Kathleen Straight and Maryann Thomas at the same time?

FunkyBunch: haha not even in his dreams

Smilax: LOL

FunkyBunch: i guess i see what you mean. on here we can be whoever we want. so i guess this means you’re not 19 and working at a temp agency to pay for college? 😛

Smilax: Guess not, Mr. football scholarship LOL

FunkyBunch: wait… how do i know this is really Julie? I’ve been chatting with you for like a month and was completely oblivious. so how do i know it’s really you just because you say so now?

Smilax: Hmm… is this you trying to get a nude?

FunkyBunch: hahaha no, but can you take a pic of your face or something? wIth today’s paper like a ransom note?

Smilax: I can’t scan photos here. How about tomorrow in class, I come up to you and say something that I’d only say if this is really me.

FunkyBunch: that could work

Smilax: What should I say?

FunkyBunch: how about “i love your big penis?”

Smilax: Ugh. How about “I chatted with you last night on AOL” instead

FunkyBunch: i guess that works

Smilax: Is this weird for you now that you know who I really am?

FunkyBunch: is it weird for you?

Smilax: Obviously not since I knew from the beginning and risked everything to tell you. But be honest. If I ruined it, let me know. I don’t want your pity chats.

FunkyBunch: tbh it did take a minute. one of the reasons i chat on here is so i can be completely honest and not have to worry about what people think. knowing that i’ll have to see you in class every day kind of affects that.

Smilax: I understand that. That’s kind of why I’m here too. But in the spirit of total honesty and all that, I really like chatting with you, Mark. If you want, we can keep this a private thing just between us and never even talk in class.

FunkyBunch: wouldn’t that be weird?

Smilax: I can keep a secret. And I think it’d be kinda cool, to have a place to chat and share truths on here without worrying about normal highschool bullshit like eating lunch together and passing notes and shit

FunkyBunch: that would be cool. i’d catch all sorts of shit from my friends if they thought we were together

Smilax: We wouldn’t want that LOL

FunkyBunch: so what do we do now?

Smilax: Did you see The Ben Stiller Show last night? He did a Die-Hard skit that was unbelievable!

FunkyBunch: can i ask you about something?

Smilax: Anything,. You know that

FunkyBunch: you sure? it’s personal

Smilax: Oooh, finally. Ask away

FunkyBunch: how many guys have you been with?

Smilax: Oh that. Did you hear something at school or something?

FunkyBunch: you know how i feel about what they sat at school

Smilax: So why are you asking?

FunkyBunch: just tell me first, then I’ll tell you why

Smilax: Well I’m not gonna give you a number or anything, but I will say this. Sex is super natural and fun and feels furking awesome, so when guys started showing interest in me and they’d ask to do stuff, I’d say yes. I was happy, he was happy, I didn’t see any harm in it. It wasn’t until people started talking about it that it became a problem. Most of that I think are these bitches like Danielle Stopper who are just jealous because she’s not getting any

FunkyBunch: i bet you’re right. all my friends would kill for some real experiences. do you think other girls are more hesitant to do anything because they’re afraid of what the danielles of the world would say?

Smilax: Oh definitely. And it’s a shame too. I guarantee they’ll regret it when they finally find out what they’re missing.

FunkyBunch: 🙂

Smilax: So now you get to tell me why you’re interested in my sex life all of a sudden after months of chatting about Eyüp Escort everything in the world BUT sex.

FunkyBunch: hahaha you said butt sex

Smilax: LOL!

FunkyBunch: B “`(====3

Smilax: ok Picasso, tell me why you’re so curious all of a sudden

FunkyBunch: well I had an epiphany this morning in the shower

Smilax: Is that what you call it?

FunkyBunch: 😛 anyway, i had a thought. it occured to me that we’ve spent more time together on here than i’ve spent with anyone except my D&D friends.

Smilax: And you didn’t know people called you a geek 😀

FunkyBunch: fair. anyway, it dawned on me that we’re at the point now where having this secret relationship is limiting. we spend all our time together anyway, we might as well make it official and hang out in real life too… hello? Afk?

Smilax: Is this just you getting horny? I REALLY hope this whole thing, months and months, wasn’t just so you could get in my pants.

FunkyBunch: no! listen to what i’m saying. i like you! i have feelings for you! i love talking to you without our bodies getting in the way. i want to hang out with you more. besides, if i was just out to get in your pants don’t you think i could’ve played that card way earlier? i know you’ve been wanting me for a while 😛

Smilax: LOL! Look at Sir Presumptuous riding high on mount Vanity! Don’t flatter yourself, geek!

FunkyBunch: 🙂

Smilax: So… if you just want to hang out in person and not fulfill my life’s desire to give me your ween, then why’d you ask about my history?

FunkyBunch: i just wanted to know that side of you too. i’m sure they’ll say stuff about both of us once we start being seen together at school and… well, yeah part of me wanted to know what was true and what was a lie, but mostly i just… i don’t know… i wanted to know more about you

Smilax: Fair enough. So you’re not… intimidated?

FunkyBunch: by what?

Smilax: By my… experience?

FunkyBunch: 🙂 nope

Smilax: My, you really ARE full of yourself aren’t you. Do you think you’re some god’s gift to women?

FunkyBunch: Nah you’re my gift

Smilax: *SWOON* Most confident virgin EVAR

FunkyBunch: who said i was a virgin?

Smilax: ?????????

FunkyBunch: 🙂

Smilax: I’ve never seen you with anyone? I mean… not that I’ve asked around or anything but…

FunkyBunch: my photographer ex, remember?

Smilax: Of course. The worldly European debutante. How could I forget.

FunkyBunch: for real. I like to keep my private life private.

Smilax: You know phone sex with 40 year olds that you meet on here doesn’t count right?

FunkyBunch: i know….

Smilax: Allllllrighty then! So what do we do now? You come into class tomorrow and sweep me off my feet?

FunkyBunch: how about we start with eating lunch together?

FunkyBunch: today was awesome 🙂

Smilax: Is that your way of saying Thank You?

FunkyBunch: 🙂 thank you

Smilax: You’re welcome. I should be the one thanking you. You gave me some desert for my lunch

FunkyBunch: :P~~~ I’ve never seen someone so… hungry

Smilax: Yeah… I just love the taste of it. Always have.

FunkyBunch: we should eat lunch in the darkroom more often

Smilax: Think Mr. Barber would get suspicious?

FunkyBunch: not as long as you leave no evidence behind

Smilax: LOL Don’t worry about that

Smilax: I have a serious question

FunkyBunch: seriously shoot then

Smilax: Why aren’t we doing more sexy times? Did I do something wrong? We were going hot and heavy then we had that time in the darkroom and now it’s been like two weeks of nothing. Was it too much? Me using my hand to shoot you into my mouth?

FunkyBunch: what?? are you kidding? that was amazing!

Smilax: So what is it then? Because it definitely feels like something’s changed and I can’t figure it out. Other guys would be all up in this by now… Um…. We’ve… What I mean is that I feel really close to you, closer than I’ve felt to anyone else. And if it’s something like you’re secretly into guys or I’m doing something wrong then I want you to know it’s ok to talk about it because… most of all I don’t want US to be ruined. Hello???? I’ve been typing for like ten minutes, say something please.

FunkyBunch: it’s not you at all. I feel the same way as you do…

Smilax: Then what is it? Because I know it’s something

FunkyBunch: it’ll sound stupid

Smilax: I promise it won’t. Please tell me!

FunkyBunch: it’s…. well, it’s my parents

Smilax: What do your parents have to do with this?

FunkyBunch: i… i just don’t want to go too far without… see this sounds stupid even in my head… without their permission

Smilax: You want to get your parents’ permission to fuck me?

FunkyBunch: no it’s not like that… more like… i want them to be ok with us being together before we’re really… like, together

Smilax: That sounds like what I just said

FunkyBunch: it’s hard to explain

Smilax: Ok so…. What needs to happen then? Because, like, I know that parents can be complete assholes but they are not in control of your entire life and we’ve got a good thing here and I don’t want it to end because of them.

FunkyBunch: I just need to talk to my Dad about it

Smilax: In that case, can you do me a favor?

FunkyBunch: what?

Smilax: Can you please ask your Dad if it’s ok for your girlfriend to suck your dick so she can taste more of your cum?

FunkyBunch: well when you put it that way 😛

Smilax: LOL. I’m serious though. Do whatever you have to do, because I’m worried

FunkyBunch: ok i will

FunkyBunch: you around?

Smilax: Just trying to read this boring ass book for english class. What’s up?

FunkyBunch: I… so, I told my dad about us tonight

Smilax: YOU DID?????

FunkyBunch: yeah

Smilax: What did he say?

FunkyBunch: he was surprisingly cool about it

Smilax: I’m glad he didn’t make it difficult for you. I know you were worried

FunkyBunch: yeah. i guess we haven’t really talked about my parents much. or yours

Smilax: Correct

FunkyBunch: i have a pretty complicated relationship with them, and you being my first real girlfriend… i guess i just haven’t had to talk to them about this kind of thing yet

Smilax: Well I’m glad it worked out. It is worked out, right? You got his blessing or whatever?

FunkyBunch. Yes. they want to meet you actually.

Smilax: Wellll… let’s take things one blowjob at a time, shall we?

FunkyBunch: lol. have you told your parents about me?

Smilax: No Furckin way!

FunkyBunch: why not?

Smilax: Because they don’t deserve to know! Really at this point I’m just a tenant in this house. As soon as I graduate I’m getting out of here.

FunkyBunch: 🙁

Smilax: No! I didn’t mean like away-from-you out-of-here, just out of the house. I’ll never leave you!

FunkyBunch: good 🙂

Smilax: You ready for tomorrow?

FunkyBunch: Escort Bayan yeah I think so. I got my dad’s tent all packed along with some sleeping bags and an air mattress. i also put fresh batteries in my boombox. got the portishead all loaded up

Smilax: Listen, I know you told me that you weren’t a virgin, but it’s ok if you’re… shy when we get up there. I mean I understand.

FunkyBunch: you don’t believe me?

Smilax: You cum pretty quick

FunkyBunch: That’s because you’re so good at giving head!

Smilax: Aww, such the compliment!

FunkyBunch: You will believe me once I’m done with you this weekend.

Smilax: Bold words. How do you plan to convince me?

FunkyBunch: with my tongue :P~~~

Smilax: now you’re talking crazy. You’re good with your hands. I’ll give you that, but going down on a woman is expert territory. There are subtle nuances to follow, sacred rhythms to abide. My kitty is very particular

FunkyBunch: the others are heading up right after school. will you have your car?

Smilax: But you didn’t even ask me what I was bringing?

FunkyBunch: oh, sorry! what did you pack?

Smilax: I made a special trip to that book store downtown

FunkyBunch: they let you in?

Smilax: They never card women!

FunkyBunch: 🙂 so what did you get?

Smilax: Let’s just say I have something pink, something lace, something clampy, and something edible

FunkyBunch: oh lord give me strength

Smilax: See you tomorrow

Smilax: Pick a movie for us to not watch tomorrow night

FunkyBunch: any preferences?

Smilax: Something not packed and loud enough to cover the sounds of me sucking your cock

FunkyBunch: looking…

FunkyBunch: this movie pulp fIction looks good. if it’s not, at least it’s long.

Smilax: And maybe beforehand we can take a ride out to the lake?

FunkyBunch: why would we want to do that? 😛

Smilax: Don’t make me type it out

FunkyBunch: I have no idea what youre talking about 😛

Smilax: Really? You’re really making me say it?

FunkyBunch: I love it when you say it

Smilax: Very well. Can we please drive out to the lake before the movie so you can eat me out and fuck me?

FunkyBunch: i’d love to m’lady :P~~~

Smilax: You’d think getting blown in a movie theater would put you in a more grateful mood LOL

FunkyBunch: i’d be grateful if we didn’t have to sneak around in empty parking lots and the back of theaters to have fun. you sure your house is never an option? you’re always saying how your parents are never home

Smilax: No, I always say that I try not to be home when they are. Big difference. And what about you? You and your friends are always hanging out at your house after school. Why can’t you invite me over too so we can sneak up to your room?

FunkyBunch: that… wouldn’t work.

Smilax: I guess it would be kind of awkward. Plus Ant and them would probably all be listening and jacking off LOL What about a different night? When they’re not there?

FunkyBunch: just us and my parents?

Smilax: Ugh. You’re right. So it’s the lake or nothing. Now don’t cum tonight ok? I want you nice and full for tomorrow. I’m hungry 🙂

Smilax: What were you ever worried about?

FunkyBunch: what do you mean?

Smilax: Your parents are awesome!

FunkyBunch: oh… yeah, they said they liked you a lot!

Smilax: They weren’t weird or anything. Why did you even warn me about them?

FunkyBunch: they CAN be weird. you just caught them on a normal night 🙂

Smilax: Well, tell your Mom that she’s a great cook. Does this mean I’m allowed to start coming over with your other friends now?

FunkyBunch: i still think you wouldn’t like that, but it does mean you can come over and swim if you want 🙂

Smilax: Mmmmm… That could be fun. Tomorrow?

Smilax: What do you think of Taylor Gray?

FunkyBunch: what do you mean?

Smilax: Do you think she’s hot?

FunkyBunch: whoa. alarm bells are ringing. what’s going on?

Smilax: Nothing! I’m just curious if you think she’s hot.

FunkyBunch: why are you setting traps for me? what’s wrong?

Smilax: This is not a trap I swear! I was just thinking that, if you thought she was hot, I think I could probably get her to play with us sometime.

FunkyBunch: …

Smilax: Is that something… you would like?

FunkyBunch: i don’t think that would be a positive experience for us

Smilax: Well what about guys? Maybe one of your friends wants to join us some time?

FunkyBunch: no

Smilax: For you then? You know I don’t mind if you’re into that. It’s kinda hot to see two guys together

FunkyBunch: what is this julie? tell me what’s going on

Smilax: Nothing! Isn’t that every guy’s fantasy? A threesome or whatever?

FunkyBunch: …i’m about to call you to get to the bottom of this if you don’t tell me right now

Smilax: I… I guess it’s just that… We’ve been together for a while now and it’s sooooo…. So Good. I think maybe I’m afraid that you will get tired of me? But you know I’m ok with whatever you want to do if there’s something we’re not doing. If it’s butt stuff on you or different partners or whatever it is…

FunkyBunch oh julie… no. you’re what i want. just you.

Smilax: Yeah but every guy says that at first. Then they see someone like Taylor with big juicy tits or whatever, some tall model type and it’s goodbye. I’ve seen it… like, a lot

FunkyBunch: one sec brb

Smilax: …uh… what’s happening?

FunkyBunch: come over. right now

Smilax: Really? Like… right-now right now? Or later-tonight-after-your-parents-go-to-bed right now?

FunkyBunch: right now

Smilax: Seriously, how cool is your Mom?

FunkyBunch: what do you mean?

Smilax: There’s no way she didn’t know we were fucking in your room thanks to your moans, Mr. Oh-God-Oh-God. But she didn’t say a thing!

FunkyBunch: yeah… they are pretty open about that stuff. It was what i was talking about last year, remember?

Smilax: Wait. I was kidding. Did you really ask your Dad if we could have sex? OMG

FunkyBunch: lol not in so many words but I knew when i told them i was seeing someone they would know what all that meant. that’s why i was so nervous. but now they know 🙂

Smilax: So I could come over there and have my way with you whenever I want and your parents are cool with it?

FunkyBunch: what if i said yes?

Smilax: Then I’d pack a bag and move in with you like in Roseanne. Darlene and David HAVE to be fucking, right?

FunkyBunch: lol i never thought about that but you are totally right!

Smilax: I mean how can they not be?

Smilax: Hey. You there?

FunkyBunch: yep, what’s up? anything wrong?

Smilax: Um… I love you.

FunkyBunch: I love you too

Smilax: I know. I just wanted to tell you on here. So it’s, like, preserved forever in the place where we met or some corny shit.

FunkyBunch: that’s istanbul Escort not corny 🙂 it’s nice

Smilax: You’re nice!

FunkyBunch: classic comeback.

Smilax: 😀 Ok I’ll be over in like half an hour.

FunkyBunch: i can’t wait

FunkyBunch: last night was nice

Smilax: Well you’re a senior now. Big man on campus. I thought we should celebrate with something special

FunkyBunch: that… was definitely special

Smilax: Furking right it was special! I enema’d for you!

FunkyBunch: and i thank you for it 😛

Smilax: I was thinking…. of asking you something.

FunkyBunch: ok

Smilax: Well, you know how we joked about that whole Roseanne situation?

FunkyBunch: many times

Smilax: Yeah… well, as it turns out, the smartest boy at Airy Heights is total shit at picking up on my subtle hints.

FunkyBunch: what do you mean?

Smilax: MARK! We’ve been dating for like… 10 years now! You know my home life is shit and your parents totally love me! Let me move in with you!

FunkyBunch: oh! wow. this sounds dumb but i never thought you were serious

Smilax: I realized that. Eventually. But now you 100% know I’m serious and the question is: What do you think?

FunkyBunch: i… well… my first thought is that i love it. but my second thought is that i have to ask my parents

Smilax: Yeah. I mean of course. Tell them I’ll do my own laundry and… I don’t eat much since I get plenty of your cum 🙂 …don’t tell them that part.

FunkyBunch: lol. yeah… this is pretty huge… this would be a pretty big change for… things…

Smilax: Are you freaking out? Because it’s only one more year until I’m out of here anyway and I’ve made it this long. I’d rather have things stay the same and not make things weird between us.

FunkyBunch: oh it’s not that. It’s more about my parents. i told you they can be weird so it might be a lot to ask of them

Smilax: You keep saying that but they’ve never been weird around me, and I’ve practically been living over there already

FunkyBunch: i’ll talk to them and get back to you ok?

Smilax: Ok, but you think about it too. I’m serious about this. Let’s not do it if you have any doubts. I’ll be ok.

Smilax: I miss you so much!

FunkyBunch: me too! i can’t believe this visit is taking so long!

Smilax: What’s it like up there? Lots of hot college girls hitting on you already?

FunkyBunch: The ratio is like five to one up here. girls aren’t so into computers.

Smilax: Good! Those nerdy bitches better stay away from my man!

FunkyBunch: 🙂

Smilax: You’re still back on Tuesday right?

FunkyBunch: yeah

Smilax: it’s so long from now! My kitty’s been purring all day

FunkyBunch: ooh poor pussy. It needs a good licking :P~~~

Smilax: You know you’ve completely ruined me on that don’t you? I’ve never been devoured like that by anyone before

FunkyBunch: what can I say? I’m addicted to the taste

Smilax: I wish you were here right now… you’d appreciate what I have on lol

FunkyBunch: describe it for me

Smilax: I’ll tell you all about it if you call me.

FunkyBunch: 🙁 i can’t. i’m staying in this guy’s dorm room for the week during pre-orientation or whatever. he’s like five feet away right now watching star wars on his tv.

Smilax: You’re finally surrounded by your own kind, nerd!

FunkyBunch: i don’t love it. we just got into a debate because he insists the real name of the movie is ‘a new hope’

Smilax: What is it really?

FunkyBunch: well… it’s complicated, but it was originally ‘star wars’ because it was the first one

Smilax: ANYWAY. So we can’t do ANYTHING?

FunkyBunch: we can type 🙂

Smilax: Tell me something about me that turns you on

FunkyBunch: you go first 🙂

Smilax: Easy. I love how your cock swells up extra big right before it explodes. I can feel it in my mouth and pussy and know you’re right on the edge

FunkyBunch: doesn’t every cock do that?

Smilax: Not like yours. It’s really special and furcking HOT

FunkyBunch: well thanks 🙂

Smilax: Now me!

FunkyBunch: the thing that comes to mind first is hard to explain and will sound stupid

Smilax: Try me

FunkyBunch: I really love how… aware you are of your sexuality

Smilax: LOL Is that code for you like how horny I am???

FunkyBunch: no! well, kinda! it seems like everyone we know is afraid or ashamed of this part of themselves. like it’s wrong or something that has to be hidden away from everyone. but you know what you like and aren’t afraid of it. it turns me on to see you so forward about it.

Smilax: Is that why you always cum so quick when I give you head?

FunkyBunch: totally! i can tell how much you like it and it totally fuels me

Smilax: Then why don’t you like 69 more?

FunkyBunch: 69 is too hard. when I’m going down on you i’m concentrating on you. when you’re going down on me i like to think about what you’re doing to me. the two are at odds with one another.

Smilax: Makes sense. See? After all this time I’m still learning about you. I’ve really never met anyone like you.

FunkyBunch: same! I can’t believe how myself i can be around you. you’re like a different species compared to the other girls in school.

Smilax: Different species huh 🙂 Does that make you into bestiality?

FunkyBunch: lol. It feels too weird to say yes to that

Smilax: LOL

FunkyBunch: have my parents been ok to you since i’ve been gone? they haven’t done anything weird have they?

Smilax: Mark! You’re parents are officially not weird! They have been perfectly normal parents the entire time! At this point, I think you are weirder than they are!

FunkyBunch: well… it’s a good thing you like weirdos then huh

Smilax: More like it’s a good thing you fuck like a furking porn star. Did you seriously argue with your roommate about the name of Star Wars?

FunkyBunch: it’s very awkward in here 🙂 i can tell he hasn’t let it go

Smilax: What are the bathrooms like there?

FunkyBunch: disgusting! like three stalls and two shower stalls right together. A lot of guys use the women’s room because they are so much cleaner.

Smilax: So have you cum since you were up there?

FunkyBunch: 🙂 yeah, once…

Smilax: where? The shower?

FunkyBunch: yeah

Smilax: I thought of another thing I want to try when we have our apartment

FunkyBunch: what’s that?

Smilax: I want to milk you into a glass that we keep in the freezer so we can collect like a hundred loads

FunkyBunch: fuuuck. then what?

Smilax: Then defrost it and see

FunkyBunch: would you drink it all? 100 loads is a lot!

Smilax: If it didn’t taste gross after defrosting. If not, maybe you can pour it all over me and fuck me while i’m glazed 😀

FunkyBunch: I love you so much

Smilax: I love you too. Have you looked for apartments yet?

FunkyBunch: Yep! The on-campus ones are only for students, but there are a ton right off campus that are actually cheaper because they’re further away. Shouldn’t be a problem.

Smilax: Oh, Mark. I can’t believe it’s finally happening.

FunkyBunch: five more weeks 🙂

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